Moonlight Reflections
by Totally-Out-Of-It
Summary: Zelos wakes before morning and thinks about his fears and insecurities... and the one person who saw through all his lies. Slash. Zelos/Lloyd


A/N: The title is 'reflections' as in reflecting on something you did, contemplating it.

Disclaimer: I do not own the RIGHTS to Tales of Symphonia. However, I do own the game and have beaten it 4 times, about to finish the 5th time. Love this game to death. I am not making any money off of this fanfiction, however. I only recieve the satisfaction of happy reviews from you people.

**Attention Artists:** This is a new thing I'm putting at the top of all my stories. If you're an artist and wish to draw pictures (doujin/fancomic included) of this or any other story I've written, you have my permission to do so on the condition that I get credit for the idea and you send it to me (links please, no file attachments).

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Long before the morning glories opened their petals or the roosters would begin to call out across the land, the majestic mansion had movement inside. The sheets of the master's bed were pulled off and he swung his legs over the side of the bed. He was waking up too soon again. Why couldn't he sleep through the night? He ran a hand through his long red locks and let out a silent breath. He moved to the window, his feet making no noise as they passed over the plush carpeted floor. There were no drafts in this house, never.

The moonlight streamed in through the window and the seat around it. Zelos sat down on the window seat gently and leaned against the window. The square below was an eerie, depressing gray. The older woman who sat in the center of the square everyday wasn't out, naturally. It was at least two hours before dawn. The courtiers and bachelors were all at home, asleep in their mansions. Those frivolous, annoying women and their jealous wanna-be boyfriends… they were old news, boring, and unnecessary. They knew nothing of living like an appropriate human being.

No one in Meltokio, or in Tethe'alla for that matter, understood Zelos… no one truly understood. Everyone saw him as exactly what he put out there, a flamboyant, womanizing, pretty boy. They saw a guy who could take any serious situation and make it stupid, play it off like it was no big deal. No one saw the way he hurt. No one saw how he would sit alone and contemplate all his choices, all his decisions along their journey. No one saw how much it hurt him to see others in pain or hear their stories of agony. It pained him to realize how easy he had it and yet he also knew their pain. He had a sheltered life of luxury, parties, royal treatment, and had an entire world that adored him… but at the same time, he had a sister who both loved and hated him, never said anything nice to his face… he had a mother who told him he should have died, that she wished he would have died. Even to this day… her words still stung and haunted him.

On the inside, Zelos was a coward. He boasted a big talk about how amazing he was, but Zelos was constantly afraid. What if he made the wrong choice? What if he let people down? What if he hurt his friends with the things he said and did?

Friends… Yes, that was something Zelos never had before. Friends. That's what he found in Lloyd, Sheena, and everybody else they traveled with. Before they showed up in this world, Zelos hadn't known what it was like to truly like someone. He'd closed off his heart to people, afraid of being hurt. See? There it was again. He was afraid. He didn't want to open himself up to others in case they betrayed him… or he betrayed them. If he ended up disappointing them in the end, he knew it would hurt terribly. If one of them died, he would die a little inside as well. That's why Zelos kept his heart sealed up. But… somehow…

Something stirred on his bed, and Zelos looked over to check what it was. A simple smile spread across his lips and he sighed a little. Yes… Somehow, someone had managed to slip through his defenses. Over their time together, someone had managed to see through his façade to the true Zelos Wilder hidden beneath.

"Zelos?" a groggy voice asked and the person in the bed rolled over to look for the master of the house.

Zelos looked up at the moon and smiled. Yes, no one from Meltokio or Tethe'alla understood Zelos. None of them knew how his heart truly felt… that it was all a lie. His flirtatious personality with girls was a lie… He didn't care for any of them. Playing off any serious situations just to hide how anything affected him… Only one person knew the real him, knew how he felt… and they were laying in his bed, waiting for him.

"Zelos?" the voice asked, clearer and confused. Zelos looked away from the moon and noticed the other person was halfway between the bed and the window. He smiled and stood up. He walked over to the only person he truly felt connected to, the person he loved. He cupped the other's face and smiled.

"Everything's alright, Lloyd. I was just thinking. Go back to bed," Zelos assured the younger male.

"No. You were having trouble sleeping again," Lloyd argued. Zelos sighed but didn't stop smiling.

"You always see right through me, hm?" Zelos murmured. He leaned down and pressed his lips to Lloyd's forehead. "Still, I'm alright. Go back to sleep. No sense in both of us losing rest."

"Zelos," Lloyd scolded gently and smiled. "You're worried about the others finding out, aren't you? You're worried about the journey being messed up because you decided to tell me how you felt… aren't you?"

Zelos stayed silent, but his smile faltered, and Lloyd knew he was right. Zelos hadn't wanted to voice it, but Lloyd had known anyway… that's why Zelos loved him, though. Zelos nodded slowly.

"Don't worry about those silly things, Zelos. It's not your style… Besides, it doesn't matter. The Professor and Colette already know how I feel, so we already have some backing. They won't want to know the details of our relationship, but they're on our side… and this doesn't change a thing. We're all going to go on and finish things and save the world, just like we promised to do," Lloyd said, putting a hand on Zelos's shoulder.

"Lloyd," Zelos began but Lloyd stopped him by covering his mouth.

"Stop thinking negatively, Zelos. Just think about how good things will be and get a good night's rest for once… okay?" Lloyd asked, looking up at Zelos with those big, brown eyes. Then he pulled his hand from the red head's mouth. Zelos chuckled softly.

"I just can't win against your ideological nonsense, can I?" he asked with a new smile.

"N-Nonsense?!" Lloyd exclaimed. Zelos chuckled and kissed Lloyd's nose. Lloyd shut up and his face turned as red as his drummer-boy clothing.

"Come on. Let's go back to bed," Zelos suggested and led the embarrassed teen back to the comfort of the bed. "We'll talk more in the morning, I promise."

Lloyd just pouted as Zelos pulled the covers over them both and pulled Lloyd close. Lloyd didn't say anything more, but he didn't have to. Zelos knew Lloyd was right, and Lloyd probably knew that too. Zelos took a deep breath of Lloyd's rustic scent and smiled. No one knew Zelos as well as this back country hick from the declining world… and Zelos was perfectly fine with that.


End file.
